I'm way past talking/writing about my problems, my happiness or my views on life. I always realise that most of the time, I'm pretty much talking to myself. Nothing gets sovled, so it's senseless. Maybe many others feel the same way too. Why bother about others when we ourselves are entangled in an endless web of choices and decisions? That's the mentality. Even I have to admit that sometimes I pretend that my friends' problems were invisible, just because I was feeling lazy and tired.

It's bad to withdraw, yet it's also wrong to pour everything out. Withdrawal makes you unhappy, insociable and grumpy. Doing the opposite compulsively makes you repulsive to those near you and gives others the impression that you're sulking big-time. So there must be a balance isn't it. It's hard to control. Even actors can't.

Yes, we humans are the most complicated creatures on this earth. No one seems to understand you when u needed to be understood most, and you most probably thought they didn't. Maybe you're wrong. Maybe you blame complicity. Maybe it's true, they don't. And you feel good telling your friends straight in the face that they don't understand you, when you wanted them to. It makes them feel hurt, it makes them put in more effort to understand you. Just for what? Just so you can feel better.
You would say,"No.....not that....whatever, you won't understand how i feel!" I hear that line (variations) many times and I always feel like beating the person up. You expect me to understand when you don't say anything. It's like giving you a boardgame and telling you,"You won't know how to play this." What's communication for? I feel that it is so wrong to judge others when you cannot even judge yourself.

The point is people just can't be bothered about others other than themselves. Well, although many people read and support Xiaxue's blog, it's purely for entertainment purposes. They read it to feel good not to know more about Xiaxue. But there's nothing wrong in self-fulfillment I must admit. Sigh.

Another question. Why do bastards, bitches and villians live or exist while heroes are dead and angels are non-existence?